Lonely Alone
by talinsquall
Summary: Cloud's bad attitude awakens the Squall in Leon. Too bad for Cloud. Cloud/Leon. Cid/Vin. Yaoi, Angst, Cursing, One-Shot. Revised 4/21/09


A/N: I'm working on curing my Leon of the Weeping Uke Syndrome. A first attempt. The writing was really hard, but I found the experience extremely satisfying. I hope you like the end product. Vincent Valentine comes from Final Fantasy 7. Revised 4/21/09

Fandom: Kingdom Hearts

Summary: Cloud finally meets the Squall Leonhart in Leon. No sir, he don't like him.

Pairings: Cloud/Leon (Squall), Cid/Vin

Warnings: Yaoi, ANGST, Cursing

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this fan fiction.

**Lonely Alone**

XXX

Cloud Strife stalked away, snarling, with a toss of spiky hair. "I don't need you nagging me! For the last time, leave me alone!"

Left by himself, for what seemed the hundredth time, to brave the gazes of curious onlookers, Leon folded his arms across his chest. He bowed his head in deep thought. Surveying in his mind, the ruin his personal life had become, he grimaced in disgust. For the former SEED Commander, changes had to be made.

Leon's thoughts became consumed with anger, not at Cloud, but with himself.

Leon's love for Cloud began, the moment he glanced into Mako-enhanced eyes, during the couple's first meeting at the Coliseum.

But in the last three years, Cloud never mentioned liking Leon, much less loving him.

Leon's hopes had risen, with his house's completion one year ago, when Cloud moved in. This last verbal blow cleared the love-sick fog from his mind.

Cloud viewed their house to be shelter. A convenient area to stow belongings, but never a home of shared love, or a steadfast refuge from solitude.

Tired of being a convenient doormat, and nothing more, Leon strode away from the Marketplace, towards the beloved home he had built with his own two hands.

Cloud Strife wanted to be left alone?

Squall Leonhart would be the one to grant this wish.

XXX

Cloud stared down at a meager pile of belongings, collected on the front porch of the house, no longer shared with Leon. Glaring harder at the sight, did not produce the anticipated result, the sorry pile failed to dissipate.

Growling, Cloud reached up to jiggle the door handle again. The changed lock held fast, telegraphing Leon's angered thoughts, better than any verbal match ever could.

Backing up to kick the clothes pile in frustration, Cloud's eyes fell on a note fallen to the wayside.

Mouth curling to the side in annoyance, Cloud swooped down. Flipping the folded paper open, with a flick of an enhanced finger, the contents did not alleviate his mood one bit.

_**Cloud,**_

_**You want to be alone? Fine. Be alone. I built this house with my own two hands. I don't want you in it. Aerith informed me your old room is still ready at the Committee House. Do what you want. I don't care anymore. Just know that you're no longer welcome here. **_

_**Squall Leonhart**_

Balling the note up, with an enraged fist, Cloud threw the paper ball at the impenetrable barrier in front of him. Enhanced hearing picking up all of Leon's swaying movements inside their home.

No, not their home. Never his home. Leon's home.

Grumbling curses under his breath, Cloud grabbed the pile up, and stomped away.

Making his way through the Bailey, towards the old Committee House, Cloud muttered to himself. Solitude would be a welcome blessing from Leon's constant presence. Silence a gift.

Arriving at the Committee House's front stoop, Cloud nodded to himself. He would be just fine.

XXX

With sad eyes, Leon gazed from afar, watching Cloud flail like a dying fish on dry land. He had forgotten how much Cloud had changed from their first meeting at the Coliseum.

Nervous with agitation, angered at his own confused helplessness, Cloud met any invasion of his personal space with over-reactive aggression. Without a comforting steady presence by his side, he had regressed back to this almost feral state, in record time.

Leon sighed, from his faraway vantage point, while Cloud yelled back to Cid's ranting. The heated discussion ended with a slammed door in Cloud's frustrated face.

Cloud forgot to make two deliveries, to the Gummi Hangar again, for the fourth time in a week.

Turning his gaze away from Cloud's yearning one, Leon did not dare to raise his eyes, until he heard Cloud walk away.

Before their separation, Leon had been the one to keep track of Cloud's delivery schedule. Calling Cloud up, he would inform him of any changes. Cloud would even talk to him sometimes.

Feeling his determination waver, Leon bit the inside of his cheek, to regain focus. His inner Squall repeated the mantra, which had always kept him on the right track. "I'm all alone, but I'm doing my best. I'll be okay without you."

Leon exhaled with relief, when the mantra worked its magic, and the tightened feeling went away. He looked down, when he felt tugging on his hand.

Smiling up to him, Aerith handed Leon more vegetables to place into the basket. She patted his hand, before returning to her gardening. "I know it's painful to watch, but I believe Cloud needs this lesson. He believes he's been alone all these years, but he hasn't."

"From what I've been told and remember, he went from living at home with his mother to going directly into the Shinra Infantry. Zack took care of him during the escape from Nibelheim. Tifa took care of him, when she discovered him at the Midgar train station. When our group formed to take on Sephiroth, the whole group cared for Cloud, until the Heartless destroyed our World. The one time he's been by himself was at the Coliseum."

Yanking a stubborn weed from the ground, Aerith threw the plant to the side. "You saw first-hand, what became of him, before you showed up."

Looking up to a pensive Leon, Aerith grasped his hand. "I thank the Gods every day you arrived to take care of him."

Leon's concerned gaze stayed locked, on his adopted sister, while she pulled more weeds. "That's the thing, Aerith. He doesn't want me to take care of him. He doesn't want me, and I refuse to be used by him anymore."

Aerith stood up, with a long stretch. Green eyes laughing with inner knowledge. "Cloud's body knows what he wants and needs. We just have to wait for his brain to catch up. Have faith, Leon. The delay shouldn't be much longer."

Placing the full basket in Aerith's arms, Leon's eyebrows furrowed. "Doesn't mean I'll take him back."

The air sang with Aerith's laughter. "Yes, you will. Just don't make the journey too hard on him, _Squall_.

Leon continued to frown at his beaming sister's face. "It's Leon."

Waving a dismissive hand, Aerith walked away from her doubt-filled adopted brother. "Oh no. This time I'm definitely talking to Squall."

XXX

Exiting the Corridors, with a slow gait, Leon's inner Squall hurled epithets at the constant blond shadow haunting his back.

When the platonic couple lived together, Leon allowed Cloud a certain liberty, concerning his body. Nothing too disturbing. While he would putter around the house, Cloud would inhale his scent. A simple way to help Cloud relax from a hard day at work. Cloud never attempted physical contact. In fact, he stood halfway across the room most of the time.

With Cloud no longer welcome, Leon no longer permitted this freedom. The last time Cloud tried, he received a hard punch for his efforts. Instead of lashing back, Cloud backed away, with head lowered in shame. Apologizing for being weak, he ran away.

Leon hadn't seen him since. However, he did feel Cloud's looming presence.

While Leon worked, every day in the Computer Room, Cloud would stand in the doorway of Ansem's old study. Not daring to enter, he stood in place, inhaling Leon's scent.

To Leon's consternation, Cloud had taken to living in the Crystal Fissure. He didn't come by the Committee House to eat anymore and never slept.

Leon knew this, because he would peer out into the breaking dawn, to find Cloud crouched down in the shadows.

With glowing eyes, Cloud would stare, with deep sadness, at a home considered too late to ever be called his.

Shaking his head, to set free the recent unhappy memories, Leon recited his mantra to help strengthen his fortitude. "I'm all alone, but I'm doing my best. I'll be okay without you."

Hunching forward, Leon's legs picked up the pace.

If the situation didn't change soon, Leon would be okay, but Cloud wouldn't.

Leon needed help and he knew exactly who to ask.

XXX

Arriving at the Committee House, Leon opened the door. Eyes searching for their intended party. Grinning, his gaze alighted on the couple in question.

"Fuck, Vince. Can't have a minute to cuddle befer the kin comes callin'."

Vincent petted Cid's head, with his golden gauntlet. Amused red eyes met Leon's. "Shush now and drink your tea, Captain. I believe our Lion has some questions for us."

While Cid followed orders, Leon took a seat, and poured himself a cup.

Setting the teacup down, with a clatter, Cid hit a fist against his knee."'Bout time! Work's behind schedule all account of some love-sick Chocobo gettin' kicked out on his ass. Don't get me wrong. Serves the dumb-fuck right. Yellin' at ya like that in public. But 'nough's enough. Time this foolishness stopped."

Gathering scatter-shot thoughts together, Leon sipped warm tea, before voicing his fears and questions. "Frankly, I'm lost. Cloud's never told me he loved me or even liked me. Since I've kicked him out, he's been following me around, like an abandoned cat. He doesn't sleep or eat. His enhancements enable his physical body to survive under any condition. But what he's doing now, I don't consider living."

Cid chuckled, while Vincent resumed cleaning Cerberus. "Boy, does this sound familiar. Plain near described Vince and me before our marriage to a T."

Cid caught Leon's dismayed gaze with a narrowed, piercing one. "What ya should be askin' yerself is do ya want his sorry ass back? 'Til ya sure on that, ain't no educatin' me or Vince could give ya to help."

Leon's gaze dropped down, searching for answers, in the dregs left in his teacup. "Nothing's changed, Cid. If I let him back into my life, he'll just treat me the same way."

Running his hand through Vincent's long hair, Cid quirked an eyebrow. "Ya sure 'bout that, Son. From what I hear, Strife's ready to eat crow."

Glowering. Leon placed the cup on the tea-table. "Things would be so much easier, if he would just talk to me, but he bolted the last time I approached him."

Chuckling, Cid clapped a reassuring hand, on his adopted son's shoulder. "Ya ever have to catch a skittish wild Chocobo?"

With the dawning realization rising, in Leon's blue-grey eyes, Cid's knowing chuckles rose to guffaws.

Harrumphing, Vincent refused to meet the loving gaze directed his way. Wild Chocobo indeed. When he allowed Cid Highwind to finally catch him, he had been much more dignified then that.

XXX

With a determined Lion's glare fixed on his face, Leon strode from the Committee House, with a mission to accomplish.

Project: Catch the Golden Chocobo.

Running the set-up in his head, Leon smiled at the utter simplicity of the plan.

The years had made the Captain a genius at reeling his lost mate back in. Whenever circumstances, and the Demons in Vincent's body, made him wander.

After entering his tidy home, Leon gathered the needed supplies. He had been warned the wait would be arduous. Frustration would be felt from both parties. Howver, with success, the reward would be sweet and life-long.

Dragging the comfy chair outside, Leon sat down, placing a basket filled with food and drink next to his feet. A soft blanket set on top, just in case the night turned chilly, during his vigil.

Settling back in the chair, Leon waited for his skittish Golden Chocobo to arrive.

In the space of two blinks, Cloud appeared in a wary crouch, before Leon's concerned eyes. The Mako making his own gleam in the oncoming twilight.

Centering himself, Leon used the time, to take in Cloud's physical condition. He shrugged to himself, at least Cloud smelled clean. Yuffie had informed him, weeks ago, that she had taken to dousing Cloud with buckets of water, to keep the funk away.

Cloud's clothes would need to be thrown away once Leon got them off. The dirt and residue cracked and flaked with his nervous movements.

XXX

Four hours later, Cloud had ventured halfway, towards a patient Leon. Close enough to touch, but far enough away to bail at the first sign of disturbance.

Leon fought the urge to jump up and haul Cloud in.

Cid had stressed all advancements had to come from Cloud.

For the relationship to progress, the decision would be Cloud's to make, since Leon had long acknowledged his own love from the start.

When Leon asked how long Cid had to wait for Vincent, his spirits lowered, with Cid's proud answer. "Two days, thirteen hours, and 56 mother-fuckin' minutes."

Vincent halted Leon's depression, when he embraced his bashful Captain, rewarding his past efforts with a kiss to the cheek. "For which I am eternally grateful. Do not give up hope, Leon. Once Cloud concedes, you will hold his heart forever."

With Vincent's heartfelt encouragement to strengthen his resolve, Leon shifted his weight, wrapping the blanket tighter around his body.

The vigil continued.

XXX

Three hours came and went.

Cloud had inched forward. Near enough, for his face to be touched, if Leon lifted his hand.

Leon stayed strong, sensing his wait would soon bear fruit.

Exhausted, Leon began to fall asleep. With happy surprise, his eyelids snapped back open, when Cloud's voice broke the heavy silence."Squall, I'm cold. I wanna come home, but I don't know how."

Lower lip trembling, Leon heard how broken his chosen mate had become. Cloud called him Squall. Now that he thought about the last three years, Cloud had never called him Leon. He had called him Squall, and Leon never tried to correct him.

For Leon, the epiphany served to reaffirm his devotion, to the lost man crouched in front of him. "I can't help you, Cloud. I think you do know how. I can't make your mind up for you. I can only sit here, and wait for you to decide, where your home lies."

Placing all his cards face-up on the table, Leon settled back in the chair, and closed his eyes.

XXX

The morning sun peeked over the horizon, when Leon received his answer. He awoke to find Cloud's filthy head buried in his warm lap. In his slumber, he had unconsciously wrapped his arms around Cloud's shoulders to hold him close.

Cloud's embrace tightened enough to be almost painful. However, this allowed Leon the certainty, he did not dream up this wished-for conclusion.

Petting Cloud's head, Leon brushed away the accumulated fine dust. "You're worth the wait. No matter what you tell yourself. I know you're worth the wait."

Cloud relaxed further in Leon's lap, reveling in his mate's missed scent. "I love you, Squall, but I don't know how to love you. You'll have to show me. But I have to warn you, I'm going to screw up a lot."

Leaning down, to kiss the side of Cloud's head, Leon grinned with the thought of his new mission. "Just follow my lead, Cloud. I have enough patience for the both of us."

Relieved in his defeat, Cloud nodded. He fell fast asleep, secure in his love's safe embrace.

With deep love, Leon gazed at his prize with a soft smile.

The Captain and Vincent had been right.

The longer the wait, the sweeter the victory.

XXX

Leon's forehead wrinkled. Eyes scanning over the changed delivery schedule. His steady hand cradled the cell phone close. Two rings sounded in his ear, before Cloud picked up. "Another change? I love you."

Leon smiled at the sincerity heard in Cloud's heart-felt declaration.

Cloud still couldn't figure out, the 'correct' time to let Leon know of his feelings, so the statement went with almost every sentence.

After a year, Leon still found the declaration endearing. "No big changes. Cid just added on two more deliveries. I'll keep dinner warm on the stove."

Running a critical eye over his surroundings, Cloud inwardly cursed the subtracted time away from his mate. "Just be there when I get home, with your ring still on, and I'll be happy. I love you."

Leon fought hard to stifle a laugh. The mentioned wedding ring shined, on the left hand, fisted on his hip. "Cloud, this ring never comes off, and you know it. Hurry up, with the deliveries, and come home."

Cloud grinned at the commanding firmness in his spouse's voice. "Okay, Squall. Remember you're my home. I love you."

Smile crinkling the corners of his eyes, Leon ran his thumb over the cherished ring. "Don't you forget it, Cloud. I love you."

Clicking the cell phone shut, Leon met the Captain's amused gaze with a frown. "What's so funny?"

Chuckling, Cid shook his head. "Damn, the Chocobo wasn't nothin' compared to my Vince. Ya got off lucky, Son."

Leon glared, resting a hip against the tea-table. "Now hold on! I waited a whole night for Cloud. Granted, the wait wasn't three friggin days, but I'm not you, Cid."

Cid met Leon's glare head-on with a grin and wink. "Never let me finish, Kid. Ah spent the two days, thirteen hours, and fifty-six minutes waitin' fer Vincent. Ah had to wait even longer for the Demons inside."

Leon tilted his head in wonderment. Gaze traveling over to a blushing Vincent. "Okay. I'll bite. What was the longest time the Demons inside Vincent made you wait?"

Jumping up, Cid sauntered over to a reddened Vincent. Plopping down beside him, he bussed his Dark Angel on the cheek. "Chaos made this sorry son-of-a-bitch wait six days, ten hours, and twenty-two minutes. The stubborn thing yelled, "Uncle!" when ah finally fell over near-dead."

The Demon, in Vincent, whined, rubbing Cid's arm. "Never frighten us like that again, My Sky. Our heart would not be able to withstand the pain."

Grin widening, Cid embraced his mate tighter. "Don't ya worry, Chaos. The Captain's done waitin'. Ah got ya now, and ah ain't never lettin' none of ya go."

With a pleased air, Leon watched the old married couple.

Even with the marriage to Cloud, a small part of Leon had held on tight to his fear-laden insecurities. Inner Squall poised, with mantra at the ready.

With the solid proof showcased in front of him, Leon released his fears, with nary a glance back.

Whatever happened in the future, Cloud would return always to the warm embrace of his home called Squall Leonhart.


End file.
